Christian Marriage Articles

Are You Fighting a Battle Your Spouse Doesn’t Even Know You Are Having?

What Can I Say to My Spouse When They Treat Me Like a Doormat?

What Can I Say to My Spouse When They Treat Me Like a Doormat?

Do you ever reach the point of exhaustion in your relationship, where you feel like you are always being criticized, unappreciated, dumped on and ripped apart—like a doormat? You think you are being taken for granted or are expected to simply agree with whatever your spouse says or does

Not All Men Need to Keep Talking about Their Hurts and Vulnerabilities

Not All Men Need to Keep Talking about Their Hurts and Vulnerabilities

When I used to do marriage counseling during my days as a pastor, I noticed a distinctive trend among the couples who would come to my office. The husband typically played it close to the vest during the session.

Are You Fighting a Battle Your Spouse Doesn’t Even Know You Are Having?

Are You Fighting a Battle Your Spouse Doesn’t Even Know You Are Having?

Husbands and wives will find themselves in conflict with each other—that is undeniable. In fact, because the apostle Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 7:28 that those who marry “will have trouble in this life,” we can also conclude that some conflict within marriage is by God’s design.

Do You Have the Humility Necessary to Move First?

Do You Have the Humility Necessary to Move First?

When a husband and wife find themselves on yet another out-of-control Crazy Cycle—where feeling unloved, she reacts without respect; and feeling disrespected, he reacts without love—how do they decide who is going to be the first to stop reacting unlovingly or disrespectfully?

What Do You Think When You Hear “Happy Wife, Happy Life”?

What Do You Think When You Hear “Happy Wife, Happy Life”?

"Happy wife, happy life!” Why will a one-sided happiness, even if it helps in the short term, come back to bite both husband and wife in the long term?

Do You Have the Humility Necessary to Move First?

What Do You Think When You Hear “Happy Wife, Happy Life”?

You Know What You’re Saying, but What Are You Communicating?

You Know What You’re Saying, but What Are You Communicating?

There are certain phrases we have been programmed to understand in a specific way whenever we hear them. For example, if someone says to us, “We need to talk,” we know there is bad news to come and we get in defensive mode.

In What Areas Is He Feeling Disrespected? Diagnosing Your Deflated Husband

In What Areas Is He Feeling Disrespected? Diagnosing Your Deflated Husband

Is your normally happy-go-lucky husband suddenly more sulky and moody? Has your typically fully engaged and intimate husband for some mysterious reason become more distant and even physically absent?

We Cannot Insist Our Spouse Have the Same Felt Needs We Do

We Cannot Insist Our Spouse Have the Same Felt Needs We Do

Do you have a specific sports team that you are outright fanatic about? Suppose you are a passionate Yankees fan whose white bedroom walls have navy blue pinstripes on them and your living room coasters have pictures of Mickey Mantle, Babe Ruth, Derek Jeter, and other Yankees greats on them.

Is Your Husband Trying to Make You Feel More Secure, but in Ways You’re Not Recognizing?

Is Your Husband Trying to Make You Feel More Secure, but in Ways You’re Not Recognizing?

A couple attended the Love and Respect Marriage Conference recently, and several weeks later the wife wrote to me to share some of the reasons why they had attended, along with her frustrations for the lack of changes she had seen in him since the conference.