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Browse through and read hundreds of articles on the topic of marriage
Sadly, many a man will not include his wife in decisions because he fears her input as an attempt to control him rather than as her desire to be his helpful teammate. Not only is this man extremely insecure (which calls into question his manhood), but some would call him imprudent.
Over the years, I have heard from many women who feel they have more of a right to speak harshly and disrespectfully to their husband than he does to speak unlovingly toward her.
A minor unannounced U-turn after church escalates into hours of tears and despair for one wife, revealing how everyday preferences quickly spiral into the Crazy Cycle of missing love and respect.
Most of us long for a better marriage, and that longing is to be applauded. However, how might some go about improving the relationship?
A husband has a need to be respected by his wife. That is what Paul teaches in Ephesians 5:33. As well, a wife has a need to be honored (respected) by her husband.
In my book Love & Respect, I wrote, "I sometimes get the question, ‘You say women need love and men need respect. Isn’t the opposite just as true? Don’t gals need respect and guys need love?’ My answer is, of course, women need respect and guys need love" (page 47).
A wife who wrote to me recognized that her husband’s suggestion to do something in a different way was rooted in his goodwill. As a result, she sought to apply a respectful demeanor in response to his suggestion, which motivated him to be more loving. Great news, right?
Some folks say, “I will love you as long as I feel love for you,” or “I will respect you as long as I feel respect for you, and I certainly won’t respect you if you have not earned it." But we need to step back for a moment.
Two women in the Bible represent the desire to find a man who is a self-reliant provider. We read in Ruth 3:1: “One day Ruth's mother-in-law Naomi said to her, 'My daughter, I must find a home for you, where you will be well provided for.'” Although this narrative is centuries old and reflects traditional views of men as providers and women as those provided for, do such sentiments still exist today?
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