Marriage Articles

You Know What You’re Saying, but What Are You Communicating?

Are You Humbly Voicing a Need or Formalizing a Complaint?

Are You Humbly Voicing a Need or Formalizing a Complaint?

In the beginning, after God had created Adam and placed him in the garden to cultivate it, He said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18).

What Does Love and Respect Enable a Wife and Husband to Do?

What Does Love and Respect Enable a Wife and Husband to Do?

In the Bible, we find two realities to which we are to respond: God’s commands and God’s promises. God calls us to obey His commands and trust His promises. Most of us have sung the song "Trust and Obey,” which captures these two quintessential truths.

You Know What You’re Saying, but What Are You Communicating?

You Know What You’re Saying, but What Are You Communicating?

There are certain phrases we have been programmed to understand in a specific way whenever we hear them. For example, if someone says to us, “We need to talk,” we know there is bad news to come and we get in defensive mode.

In What Areas Is He Feeling Disrespected? Diagnosing Your Deflated Husband

In What Areas Is He Feeling Disrespected? Diagnosing Your Deflated Husband

Is your normally happy-go-lucky husband suddenly more sulky and moody? Has your typically fully engaged and intimate husband for some mysterious reason become more distant and even physically absent?

We Cannot Insist Our Spouse Have the Same Felt Needs We Do

We Cannot Insist Our Spouse Have the Same Felt Needs We Do

Do you have a specific sports team that you are outright fanatic about? Suppose you are a passionate Yankees fan whose white bedroom walls have navy blue pinstripes on them and your living room coasters have pictures of Mickey Mantle, Babe Ruth, Derek Jeter, and other Yankees greats on them.

In What Areas Is He Feeling Disrespected? Diagnosing Your Deflated Husband

We Cannot Insist Our Spouse Have the Same Felt Needs We Do

In Marriage, a Misdiagnosis Can Lead to the Crazy Cycle

In Marriage, a Misdiagnosis Can Lead to the Crazy Cycle

Anyone who has visited the emergency room or urgent care with a mystery pain or illness knows how important it is to receive an accurate diagnosis from the doctor.

Who’s to Blame When Pinocchio or Mr. Magoo Reads Love & Respect?

Who’s to Blame When Pinocchio or Mr. Magoo Reads Love & Respect?

One person said about my book Love & Respect: This was one of my chief concerns with the book when I read it 10 years ago. Wives are portrayed as being actually disrespectful, while a husband is portrayed as simply being misunderstood. The problem was always ultimately the wife, either her own actions, or her perception.

When You Can Be Right but Wrong with the Choice of Your Words

When You Can Be Right but Wrong with the Choice of Your Words

For many years I’ve shared the sentiment that “you can be right but wrong at the top of your voice.” This stemmed from a conversation I had with my wife, Sarah, one night as we were driving home from a small group meeting I was leading.

Do Wives Only Need Love and Husbands Only Need Respect?

Do Wives Only Need Love and Husbands Only Need Respect?

In my book Love & Respect, I wrote, "I sometimes get the question, ‘You say women need love and men need respect. Isn’t the opposite just as true? Don’t gals need respect and guys need love?’ My answer is, of course, women need respect and guys need love" (page 47).