Amor Y Respeto - Cuaderno De Trabajo: Videoconferencia (Descargar PDF)

Positive changes flood a relationship immediately when both husband and wife cancel the blame game!

Marriage is a tool and a test to allow God’s will to be revealed in our lives.

Your marriage is a test of your devotion to Christ.

You can be right but wrong at the top of your voice.

If you want your wife to express appreciation for your attempts to be loving, you must use thankful words when she tries to speak or act respectfully.

Thank the Lord for all the trouble-free moments in which you and your spouse enjoy Him, each other, your family, your ministry and life as a whole. Ask Him for the strength to accept your measure of trouble, and the wisdom to deal with the annoyances and irritations by loving and respecting each other with new commitment. (You may also want to pray about troubles at work, at church, with the children…) “But those who marry will have trouble in this life” (1 Corinthians 7:28)

We are either going to give in the darkness or we are going to give into the darkness.

A marriage relationship will be energized when couples learn how to motivate each other God’s way.

We can communicate the truth in the best of manners, but the person may be so insecure he or she can only react and attack like a wounded bear.

When confronting your spouse, attack the behavior, not the person.

A major step toward a happy marriage is accepting differences and working them out with love and respect.

[Husbands] as the church places her burdens on Christ, so a woman needs to place her burdens on her husband. When she shares with you, don’t assume she is asking you to solve the problem. Ask your wife, “Do you want a solution or a listening ear?”

A wife has one driving need: to feel loved. When that need is met, she is happy. A husband has one driving need: to feel respected. When that need is met, he is happy. When either of these needs isn’t met, things get crazy with conflict.

The difference between successful couples and unsuccessful couples is that successful ones keep getting up and dealing with the issues.

“You can be right, but wrong at the top of your voice.”

It’s hard to realize that we would never act around our business associates the way we act around our spouse.

Our trustworthiness rests on our truthfulness.

It is crucial for a husband and wife to see that neither one is wrong, but both of them are very different--in body function, outlook and perspective.

Since it is easy to focus on the negative, focus on your mate’s good qualities and express thanks with positive words of Love or Respect.

We are equal but we are not the same.

God is not pink. God is not blue. God is purple. When two become one, they have the potential of displaying God’s attributes and character.

Do you give yourself grace and your spouse judgment?

Pink and Blue perceptions not only affect seeing, they affect hearing as well. Women hear with pink hearing aids and men hear with blue hearing aids. Even more important to understand as you and your spouse seek to gain better communication, you can hear the very same words, but each of you will hear different messages.

We all need to wrestle with the spiritual truth that God is good. If you don’t believe God is good, you won’t trust His word. If you don’t trust His word, you will find excuses to ignore His commands.

Research and experience prove that men and women see and hear differently. Recognizing these differences and adjusting to them is absolutely necessary for reaching mutual understanding and better communication.

Do you bow to the influence of Hollywood or God’s Holy Word?

[Husbands] do you realize the power of just holding your wife’s hand?

When one of you makes a mistake, control any anger you may feel and trust God completely, no matter what happens.

If we subscribe to the belief that because we are equal we are the same, then we’re going to expect our spouse to respond the way we do.

To stay the course in speaking words of Love and Respect, keep your heart in Scripture, trusting in and talking about His promises to help you.

It’s so easy to dismiss our spouse as childish because we don’t have the same vulnerabilities they do.

Never give up. If you want to have a strong marriage, you need to accept temporary setbacks as part of the game.

Holding back your love or respect will just keep the Crazy Cycle spinning away, but being mature and making the first move could slow it down.

Women give a report to build rapport. Men bond through shoulder-to-shoulder activities without talking.

Parenting is a faith venture. As we parent “unto Christ” we reap God’s reward, “knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same from the Lord” (Eph. 6:8 NKJV)

Do you understand that God feels compassion for you, no matter what you have done or what your circumstances may be?

I have concluded that those of us in the church who believe we have the Truth are not using the whole truth. A crucial part of God’s Word has been completely ignored, or perhaps simply gone unnoticed, when it has been there right under our noses the whole time! Many Christian spouses know Ephesians 5:33 and can at least paraphrase it. The Apostle Paul tells husbands to love their wives as much as they love themselves, and wives are to respect their husbands. But is anyone really listening? Perhaps the first step to better communication between husband and wife is to hear what God’s Word clearly says. --Emerson

When you come home after you have been apart, the first few moments of reconnecting will set the tone for the rest of the evening.

The heart of my communication means the other person cannot get my heart to be unkind, unloving, or disrespectful. Instead, I have made a decision about who I will be independent of the other person. I won’t blame my unkindness on someone else.

Husbands, to energize your wife give her face-to-face time, allowing her to talk and share her feelings.

Mutual understanding, not communication, is the key to a healthy marriage relationship.

With a better understanding of God’s promises, you will be on your way to a renewed mind and a changed life.

As strong and powerful as marriage bonds can become, our deepest dependency must be on the Lord, not another human being.

Most marriages will succeed when obeying the command to Love and Respect.

We have different vulnerabilities. We can pass judgment on one another all day long or we can say God made us different and that’s ok.

The woman absolutely needs love, and the man absolutely needs respect. It’s as simple- and as difficult- as that.

Being a person who communicates what is true frequently demands tact, and at times it can feel like sidestepping land mines. It takes work to be both truthful and tactful.

The Crazy Cycle is, indeed, “the evil of folly and the foolishness of madness” (Ecclesiastes 7:25).

Every marriage includes trouble some of the time. Do not let the 20% leaven all the rest.

You have two ears and one mouth; use them proportionately.

As you pray together, you will truly learn to love and respect together.

Your spouse can affect you, but your spouse does not control you.

We have discovered that as women motivate their man God’s way, men are energized to love them better. It doesn’t matter if your marriage is good or seems like there is no hope. We have seen God move in powerful ways even when things looked hopeless.

We are worth Jesus to the Father.

When your wife comes to talk to you, listen to her. Realize she is coming to you because you matter more to her than anyone else. She has certain emotional needs and only you can meet them. Sometimes she may say things that don’t make sense to you and she is apt to misspeak and exaggerate when she is upset, but don’t put her down. Instead, listen to her heart. Give her a chance to express her concerns and, as she does so, don’t try to fix her. Don’t give her your solutions unless she asks for them.

No matter how difficult your spouse may be at the moment, your spouse does not have control over your reaction; you do. You may be experiencing disappointment, frustration, or anger, but you always have a choice.

Each of you must focus on what God is calling you to do toward your spouse. Do not focus on what you think God is calling your spouse to do toward you.

Do you seek to understand or only to be understood?

At the very bottom of things, in every case and in every conversation, you can do your marriage a huge favor by assuming she is seeking to feel loved or he is seeking to feel respected and give your spouse some grace!

Your wife feels you are open with her when you discuss financial concerns, possible job changes or ideas for your future.

We fool ourselves into thinking the other person causes us to be the way we are. They really don’t! But if we lock into that idea, we become helpless, hopeless victims.

When you look to God and His Word as your ultimate source of significance and security, you don’t demand that your spouse take that role in your life. And as you draw strength from the Lord individually, He draws you closer together as a couple.

Here is the secret to marriage that every couple seeks and yet few find: Unconditional respect is as powerful for him as unconditional love is for her. It’s the secret that will help you achieve a brand new level of intimacy.

Your marriage is really a tool and a test to deepen and demonstrate your love and reverence for your Lord.

I had often asked God to compensate for my mistakes, but in return had I thought He would give me perfect children?

When you play the blame game your marriage never wins.

This is the Rewarded Cycle: His love blesses regardless of her respect and her respect blesses regardless of his love.

Life is too short to fuss and fret over trivial irritations.

Suppressing negative feelings is not loving, respectful or very wise. Speak up tactfully.

Share what God is saying to your heart, not what you think He needs to say to your mate.

When we speak before we think, we widen the chances the other person(s) will be notably hurt, frustrated, confused, angry, fearful, or offended by something we’ve communicated.

God rewards your obedience to love and respect, even if your spouse does not respond!

Don’t label each other as bad because you differ on how you solve your troubles.

Will we decide how we see God based on our circumstances, or will we see our circumstances in light of how we view God?

Your wife will feel esteemed when you speak highly of her in front of others.

Your spouse can have a need that you don’t have and that’s okay.

Accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative with lots of love and respect in between.

Accidental sparks (unwise remarks) ignite and fuel a fire, and vroom goes the Crazy Cycle.

Be quick to listen and understand and you have a much better chance of being understood.

Whose voice are you listening to: Hollywood or God’s Holy Word?

Ladies, be careful. “A nagging wife goes on and on like the drip, drip, drip of the rain” (Proverbs 19:13).

Stay the course regardless of the child’s respect and obedience. This is the Family Rewarded Cycle: a parents love unto Christ regardless of the child.

Before hitting send, ask yourself, "Have I listened carefully and understand the exact issue on the table?"

No one can really practice Love and Respect unless he or she does it as unto Jesus Christ.

Unconditional respect, like unconditional love, is all about how one sounds (tone of voice and word choice) and appears (facial expressions and physical actions).

To get offended is easy, but to forgive is within your power as you walk in His steps.

You both forgive for one simple but profound reason: because you know Christ has forgiven you!

We easily see what is done to us before we see what we are doing to our mate.

A woman needs love like she needs air to breathe. A man needs respect like he needs air to breathe.

Be friendly. Be friendly. Be friendly. Watch what happens.

Trusting and obeying God’s Word because we love and reverence God never, ever makes us a hypocrite! When the alarm goes off in the morning, we get up, even when we don’t feel like it getting up. Because we do what we don’t feel like doing, does that make us hypocrites? No, it’s a sign we are responsible people. Showing respectful behavior when we don’t “feel respectful” is evidence of maturity.

Don’t conclude that your spouse is wrong when he/she is seeking to do the right and righteous thing.

No matter what your struggle- criticism, constant conflict, sex, money, parenting, harsh words- learning to communicate the Love and Respect way can help you make crucial changes and build the kind of relationship that God blesses.

The moment we cry to Him for help, He is already pleased. He gives us strength to love our children.

The parent-child relationship is as easy, and as difficult, as love and respect.

The more we are upset at something, the wiser it is to let twenty-four hours pass before responding.

In your marriage be the first to “seek peace and pursue it” (1 Peter 3:11)

We all need love and respect equally. But, during conflict our felt needs are as different as pink is from blue.

Often the apparent issue isn’t the real issue; the real issue is always a matter of love or respect.

We must bring our identity in Christ to our parenting—we must not derive our identity from our children.