The Love and Respect Devotional

52 Weeks To Experience Love & Respect In Your Marriage. Have you ever been excited about having a regular devotional time with your spouse, only to end up feeling distracted, frustrated, or misunderstood after your time together? While most women are energized by the idea of going through a couples’ devotional, best-selling author and marriage expert Dr. Emerson Eggerichs has observed that many men feel the opposite.

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The Love & Respect Devotional

52 Weeks

A Husband-Friendly Devotional That Wives Truly Love

Have you ever experienced the disappointment of eagerly anticipating a meaningful devotional time with your spouse, only to find yourself feeling distracted, frustrated, or misunderstood afterwards? It is a common scenario where women often feel energized by the idea of engaging in a couples' devotional, while men may have a different perspective. According to Dr. Emerson Eggerichs many husbands simply do not find the standard devotional books for couples to be interesting or relatable. After attempting it a few times, they tend to seek alternative activities, leaving the devotional practice behind. Recognizing this common challenge, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs offers insights and solutions to transform your devotional experience.

Learning Love & Respect

With the invaluable insights gained from surveying thousands of couples about their deepest concerns and struggles, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs has meticulously crafted a fifty-two week devotional that speaks to the hearts of both wives and husbands. In this transformative journey, each concise devotional is thoughtfully designed to fit into your busy lifestyle, guiding you to explore the core principles of Love & Respect while inviting you to uncover the personal messages God has for you individually and as a couple. Recognizing the uniqueness of every relationship, Dr. Emerson provides practical, tailored advice and direction to ensure this devotional becomes a powerful catalyst for growth in your marriage. This tool will invigorate your relationship with God and rejuvenate your marriage with the transformative power of love and respect.

Get to know...

Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs is an internationally known public speaker on the topic of male-female relationships. Based on over three decades of pastoring, counseling and study of biblical and scientific research, Dr. Eggerichs and his wife Sarah developed the Love and Respect Conference which they present to live audiences around the country.

About Love & Respect
Portrait of Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs

Product Quotes

To build a lasting legacy, use proven wisdom that you glean from the Lord.

The Love and Respect Experience

When one of you makes a mistake, control any anger you may feel and trust God completely, no matter what happens.

The Love and Respect Experience

When a husband chooses to do or say something loving, and that includes saying, ‘I’m sorry for coming across in an unloving way,’ he energizes his wife. When a wife decides to express herself respectfully, and that includes apologizing for her disrespectful attitude, she energizes her husband.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

No matter what your struggle- criticism, constant conflict, sex, money, parenting, harsh words- learning to communicate the Love and Respect way can help you make crucial changes and build the kind of relationship that God blesses.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

When evil comes at you, you’re the one who makes the choice of whether or not it is going to go into you.

The Illumination Project (Journal)

When a wife feels unloved, it can be such a shock to her heart that she is oblivious to her disrespectful reactions toward her husband, though any man watching could see it plainly.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Wives, to energize your husband do an activity with him, shoulder-to-shoulder, without talking.

Building Blocks

Love and Respect is a faith venture, not a formula.

Building Blocks

The mature one in the marriage seldom moves second.

The Love and Respect Experience

Refuse to let evil turn you into a contemptuous and hateful person.

Love & Respect Podcast

We are worth Jesus to the Father.

The Illumination Project (Journal)

We fool ourselves into thinking the other person causes us to be the way we are. They really don’t! But if we lock into that idea, we become helpless, hopeless victims.

Respectfully Yours

He will feel appreciated when you disagree with him only in private and honor his authority in front of the kids.

Love & Respect

With a better understanding of God’s promises, you will be on your way to a renewed mind and a changed life.

Respectfully Yours

Thank God for joining you together and for allowing you to trust Him to help you, whatever the issue. God is there for you and expects you to look to Him to keep you together as a team, so ask Him for His help in the smallest of concerns. “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” (Matthew 19:6)

The Love and Respect Experience - Prayers

Each of you must focus on what God is calling you to do toward your spouse. Do not focus on what you think God is calling your spouse to do toward you.

Building Blocks

“You can be right, but wrong at the top of your voice.”

Before You Hit Send

One thing to remember in this culture is if we say something complimentary towards one gender, we aren’t saying something against the other.

The Illumination Project (Journal)

Positive changes flood a relationship immediately when both husband and wife cancel the blame game!

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

“Living happily ever after” means knowing how to deal with the imperfect parts of life.

The Love and Respect Experience

Responding to offensive words or actions with your own offensive words and actions is damaging and unproductive.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

No one can really practice Love and Respect unless he or she does it as unto Jesus Christ.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Getting married reveals, usually sooner than later, an incontestable fact: your spouse cannot possibly meet all your needs and desires

The Love and Respect Experience

[Husbands] as the church places her burdens on Christ, so a woman needs to place her burdens on her husband. When she shares with you, don’t assume she is asking you to solve the problem. Ask your wife, “Do you want a solution or a listening ear?”

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Share what God is saying to your heart, not what you think He needs to say to your mate.

The Love and Respect Experience

God is good and wants what is best for us.

Respectfully Yours

We are either going to give in the darkness or we are going to give into the darkness.

The Illumination Project (Journal)

The key to motivating another person is meeting their deepest need, especially during conflict.

Love & Respect Podcast

Christian maturity involves a lot of things, but surely it includes knowing how to process your anger.

The Love and Respect Experience

Words of Love or Respect must uplift your spouse, edifying- never manipulating him or her.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Your husband knows you appreciate his desire to protect and provide when you praise his commitment to provide for you. You empathize when he reveals his male mindset about position, status, or rank at work.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

When a husband chooses to come across lovingly even though he feels disrespected, he can prevent the Crazy Cycle from spinning and possibly getting out of control.

The Language of Love & Respect

You can be right in the argument, but wrong in your approach.

Love & Respect Podcast

Although the Crazy Cycle is not what God intends for any marriage, all couples get on it at times from one degree to another.

The Language of Love & Respect

If a husband is commanded to agape- love his wife, then she truly needs love.

Love & Respect

Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean the other person is offensive.

Love & Respect Podcast

If a husband loves his wife as he should, she will feel honored and respected. If a wife respects her husband as she should, he will feel loved and appreciated. It’s a win-win.

The Love and Respect Experience

You must “ask God from the wealth of his glory to give you power through his Spirit to be strong in your inner selves.”

The Language of Love & Respect Book

Since it is easy to focus on the negative, focus on your mate’s good qualities and express thanks with positive words of Love or Respect.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

You must distinguish between “I can’t” and “I won’t.”

Love & Respect

The heart of my communication means the other person cannot get my heart to be unkind, unloving, or disrespectful. Instead, I have made a decision about who I will be independent of the other person. I won’t blame my unkindness on someone else.

Before You Hit Send

We have discovered that as women motivate their man God’s way, men are energized to love them better. It doesn’t matter if your marriage is good or seems like there is no hope. We have seen God move in powerful ways even when things looked hopeless.

Respectfully Yours

Your words reveal your heart.

The Love and Respect Experience

As a husband, if you can grasp that you don’t always have to solve your wife’s problems, you will take a giant step toward showing her empathy and understanding.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Marriage is a tool and a test to deepen and demonstrate your love and your reverence for Jesus Christ.

Respectfully Yours

Husbands, even Jesus Himself was asked by a woman, “Do you not care?” (Luke 10:40) When your wife accuses you of not caring, decode her deeper meaning.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

“With eyes of faith, envision Jesus standing just beyond the shoulder of your spouse and listening to every word you speak in every conversation, pleasant or tense. When you speak lovingly or respectfully to your spouse, you are speaking to Christ. Your spouse just happens to be there too.” This truth has sanctified the lips of many. Instead of giving their spouse a verbal whipping or choking on the idea of saying anything positive, now some spouses are motivated to speak words of unconditional love or respect.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

When we feel crippling discouragement by the sinful choices and outcomes of our kids, we must not let this permanently deter us from parenting God’s way.

Love & Respect in the Family

When your wife comes to talk to you, listen to her. Realize she is coming to you because you matter more to her than anyone else. She has certain emotional needs and only you can meet them. Sometimes she may say things that don’t make sense to you and she is apt to misspeak and exaggerate when she is upset, but don’t put her down. Instead, listen to her heart. Give her a chance to express her concerns and, as she does so, don’t try to fix her. Don’t give her your solutions unless she asks for them.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

God’s commands are there to help us, not to hinder us or hold us back as male and female.

The Illumination Project (Journal)

Parenting is a faith venture. As we parent “unto Christ” we reap God’s reward, “knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same from the Lord” (Eph. 6:8 NKJV)

Love & Respect in the Family

God is not pink. God is not blue. God is purple. When two become one, they have the potential of displaying God’s attributes and character.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

[Women], as you enter quiet dignity, not preaching at your husband or scolding him as though you were his mother, something happens in his soul as a male.

Respectfully Yours

Through Jesus and Peter, God set forth His standard for living in the unconditional dimension: choose to be loving even when the other person is not; do what is right regardless of the treatment you receive. I believe this standard applies directly to marriage. A husband who speaks lovingly to his disrespectful wife will be rewarded; and a wife who speaks respectfully to her unloving, not-worthy-of-respect husband will be rewarded. Whether you are husband or wife, the reward is what can keep you going in the midst of the craziness: knowing that God commends you, knowing that you have found his favor for your words and actions.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

It’s crucial to communicate with the right tone of voice and the right expression on your face.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Men are solution oriented, they love to solve problems. They want to be helpful.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

How we react to a situation reveals more about us than about the other person.

Respectfully Yours

His love motivates her respect. Her respect motivates his love.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

Often the apparent issue isn’t the real issue; the real issue is always a matter of love or respect.

The Love and Respect Experience

I had often asked God to compensate for my mistakes, but in return had I thought He would give me perfect children?

Love & Respect in the Family

Life is too short to fuss and fret over trivial irritations.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

Be a part of the solution, not part of the problem.

Before You Hit Send

Words of wisdom for all husbands and wives are these: We easily see what is done to us before we see what we are doing to our mate.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

When you love or respect unconditionally regardless of the outcome, you are following God and His will for you.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

To get offended is easy, but to forgive is within your power as you walk in His steps.

The Love and Respect Experience

When there is confusion, I try to refrain from attacking another for not listening carefully (which may not be the case). Instead, I take a run at communicating again, but more clearly.

Before You Hit Send

Your marriage is a tool and a test to deepen and demonstrate your love and reverence for Jesus Christ. God is using your spouse to bring you an eternal reward.

Building Blocks

Husbands primarily want to hear ‘respect” talk during conflict. Wives primarily want to hear “love” talk during conflict.

Building Blocks

God rewards your obedience to love and respect, even if your spouse does not respond!

The Language of Love & Respect Book

Often both spouses have goodwill but are not deciphering each other’s code. She criticizes out of love, but he “hears” only disrespect. He distances himself to prevent feelings from escalating, which is the honorable thing to do, but she “sees” only his failure to be loving!

Love & Respect

Your spouse can have a need that you don’t have and that’s okay.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Feeling unloved, a wife gets defensive and acts offensively without respect. Feeling disrespected, a husband gets defensive and acts offensively without love.

The Love and Respect Experience

God designed the woman to love. He’s not going to command her to agape her husband when He created her to do that in the first place. God is not into redundancy.

Love & Respect

“Respect is a man’s deepest value. I have had numerous men tell me, ‘I would rather live with a wife who respected me but did not love me than live with a wife who loved me but did not respect me.’ These men are not saying that they are indifferent to love. They know they need love, but they need to feel respected even more than they need to feel loved.“

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Mutual understanding, not communication, is the key to a healthy marriage relationship.

Building Blocks

God’s commands are not burdensome, but are given to us to spare us from more pain. Why would God command you to do something that doesn’t work?

Respectfully Yours

When you play the blame game your marriage never wins.

The Love and Respect Experience

The Crazy Cycle is, indeed “the evil of folly and the foolishness of madness” (Ecclesiastes 7:25)

Love & Respect

Assuming goodwill can be revolutionary in relationships.

The Illumination Project (Journal)

A woman needs love like she needs air to breathe. A man needs respect like he needs air to breathe.

Building Blocks

When you possess a forgiving spirit, words of Love and Respect will flow authentically from your lips- and realize that the Lord Himself is listening to you at moments like these. He knows you are not powerless, but actually full of power that He has granted you.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

There is a discrepancy between who we want to be and see ourselves to be and how we actually sound in voice and writing. But with self-reflection and honesty, we can turn the corner and improve our communication. We need only evaluate what we are about to communicate.

Before You Hit Send

Respect for the husband is just as important as love for the wife.

Love & Respect

Trust God when the “why’s” of life threaten to overwhelm you.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

Research and experience prove that men and women see and hear differently. Recognizing these differences and adjusting to them is absolutely necessary for reaching mutual understanding and better communication.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

A most significant point of this book is this: If what we think is true, kind, necessary, and clear, we need to have the courage to hit send. This isn’t about refraining from speaking; this is about speaking.

Before You Hit Send

As mature men, we need to take leadership and put this out on the table. We must acknowledge our feelings- we need to feel respected. However, as we do this we must acknowledge our wife’s feelings- she needs to feel loved!

Love & Respect

We must bring our identity in Christ to our parenting—we must not derive our identity from our children.

Love & Respect Podcast

Never give up. If you want to have a strong marriage, you need to accept temporary setbacks as part of the game.

The Love and Respect Experience

Do you seek to understand or only to be understood?

The Love and Respect Experience

When parents genuinely trust and follow the Lord and His ways, their faith spills over onto the children.

The Love and Respect Experience

Whether visiting a prison, feeding the hungry, giving the thirsty a drink or speaking a word of love or respect, everything is to be done to and for Christ.

The Language of Love & Respect Book

You can be right but wrong at the top of your voice.

Love & Respect

If you are seeking positive change in your marriage, you will need to make a positive change in your attitude and actions.

Respectfully Yours

Negative actions rarely produce positive results.

Respectfully Yours

Words of Love and Respect must include thankfulness spoken to or about your spouse; don’t fixate on weaknesses and faults.

Love & Respect for a Lifetime

When sorting out how to slow down the Crazy Cycle, it helps to remember that men are commanded to love because they don’t love naturally, and on the other side, women are commanded to respect because they don’t respect naturally.

Love & Respect

She’s not wrong for not being male. He is not wrong for not being female. When you put pink and blue together, you get purple, the color of royalty; the color of God. Together, a husband and wife reflect God’s image.

Building Blocks

A strong woman of dignity puts on respect out of her love and reverence for Jesus Christ. She trusts that His word not only protects and empowers her, but also rewards her with incomprehensible eternal blessings.

Respectfully Yours

We all need love and respect equally. But, during conflict our felt needs are as different as pink is from blue.

Building Blocks
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