Christian Marriage Articles

When There’s Something Else Going On Behind the Conflict

What’s Really Going On with the Husband Who Doesn’t Want His Wife’s Input?

What’s Really Going On with the Husband Who Doesn’t Want His Wife’s Input?

Sadly, many a man will not include his wife in decisions because he fears her input as an attempt to control him rather than as her desire to be his helpful teammate. Not only is this man extremely insecure (which calls into question his manhood), but some would call him imprudent.

Do Different Reactions Toward Their Spouse’s Contempt Mean One Is More Justified than the Other?

Do Different Reactions Toward Their Spouse’s Contempt Mean One Is More Justified than the Other?

Over the years, I have heard from many women who feel they have more of a right to speak harshly and disrespectfully to their husband than he does to speak unlovingly toward her.

When There’s Something Else Going On Behind the Conflict

When There’s Something Else Going On Behind the Conflict

A minor unannounced U-turn after church escalates into hours of tears and despair for one wife, revealing how everyday preferences quickly spiral into the Crazy Cycle of missing love and respect.

Profiling a Spouse: The Invitation to Unearth New Insights Explaining Their Behaviors

Profiling a Spouse: The Invitation to Unearth New Insights Explaining Their Behaviors

Most of us long for a better marriage, and that longing is to be applauded. However, how might some go about improving the relationship?

He Desires to Be First Among Equals, She Desires to Be First in Importance

He Desires to Be First Among Equals, She Desires to Be First in Importance

A husband has a need to be respected by his wife. That is what Paul teaches in Ephesians 5:33. As well, a wife has a need to be honored (respected) by her husband.

Profiling a Spouse: The Invitation to Unearth New Insights Explaining Their Behaviors

He Desires to Be First Among Equals, She Desires to Be First in Importance

Crying Out For Love Disrespectfully

Crying Out For Love Disrespectfully

A wife writes to tell me her marriage is falling apart. In not a few cases, this happens because the husband does not understand his wife's heart. But he does not understand her heart and need for love because she misses his heart and need for respect. For example, a husband feels respected when his wife spends time with him shoulder to shoulder. But if she wants face to face time talking in order to feel loved and therefore denounces with great disrespect his request for shoulder to shoulder time, this husband won't understand his wife's heart. He won't hear her cry for love. Her disrespect deafens him to her cry.

Selling Brass Knuckles To Mother Teresa

Selling Brass Knuckles To Mother Teresa

I love how people apply the Love and Respect message. There is something about this message -- or subpoints of this message -- that bring about life change in people. Sarah and I continue to be overjoyed and grateful to God.A husband writes, "My church held a conference here in Vancouver BC Canada with your DVDs. Just before that I was having a hard time in my relationship with my wife. Your views on relationships and what God expects of us through Ephesians was astounding.

Learning From The Heart Cry Of Others

Learning From The Heart Cry Of Others

Daily, Sarah and I receive e-mails from people across the nation and around the world that profoundly touch us, and I mean profoundly to the point that we sometimes weep. We're overwhelmed with the tender hearts, teachable spirits, and inner longings of the people who write us. The below e-mail brought tears to our eyes not only because of this woman's personal situation but because she represents so many people right now who if they heard the love and respect message might be able to turn the corner on a marriage that appears destined for collapse. This woman read my book CRACKING THE COMMUNICATION CODE (now The Language of Love & Respect) and realized that possibly she could've done things differently. She did not hold herself 100% responsible for the collapse of the marriage but... well, read what she said:

On Abuse in Marriage

For decades, my position regarding abuse has been clear: when in harm’s way, get out. Separate. My mom separated from my dad for five years because of his abusive conduct. I have zero tolerance for abuse. I was a victim of this, even having watched my dad attempt to strangle my mom. I have incessantly made this point of getting out of harm’s way whenever the issue of abuse arises.

On Abuse in Marriage