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A Wife’s Hurt Feelings: Beyond a Husband’s Apology, Rethinking a Fresh Approach
NEWEST Article

A Wife’s Hurt Feelings: Beyond a Husband’s Apology, Rethinking a Fresh Approach

If I ranked comments from wives to me, this one comes in close to the top: “My husband hurts my feelings.”

A Wife’s Hurt Feelings: Beyond a Husband’s Apology, Rethinking a Fresh Approach
Marriage
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6
min read
Seek Mutual Understanding, Not Divorce
NEWEST Article

Seek Mutual Understanding, Not Divorce

Countless divorcees have told us over the years that had they known the Love and Respect truth underlying the negative cycle they found themselves constantly on (which we refer to as the Crazy Cycle), they would never have divorced.

Seek Mutual Understanding, Not Divorce
Marriage
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9
min read
When Disappointed in Our Spouse, Do We Address Their Conduct or Attack Their Character?
NEWEST Article

When Disappointed in Our Spouse, Do We Address Their Conduct or Attack Their Character?

Husbands and wives are going to disagree . . . many times. They’re going to have arguments . . . many times. On top of that, husbands will disappoint wives, and wives will disappoint husbands, bringing reason for the offended or hurt spouse to broach a possibly sensitive or tough topic. 

When Disappointed in Our Spouse, Do We Address Their Conduct or Attack Their Character?
Marriage
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6
min read
“My Response Is My Responsibility”—7 Fears and 7 Benefits
NEWEST Article

“My Response Is My Responsibility”—7 Fears and 7 Benefits

There is an axiom that I have used in my teachings for as long as I can remember that, to this day, I still fully believe in its simple but life-changing truth: “My response is my responsibility.”

“My Response Is My Responsibility”—7 Fears and 7 Benefits
Marriage
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10
min read
According To Jesus, All We Need To Be Content Is Food, Covering, And One More Thing...
NEWEST Article

According To Jesus, All We Need To Be Content Is Food, Covering, And One More Thing...

When I was on staff at a church in the 1970s, we sought to serve widows and orphans. Though they were not all widows, we decided to lean into assisting single parents specifically.

According To Jesus, All We Need To Be Content Is Food, Covering, And One More Thing...
Christian Life
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6
min read
Seek Mutual Understanding, Not Divorce

Seek Mutual Understanding, Not Divorce

Seek Mutual Understanding, Not Divorce
Marriage
Image duration icon
9
min read
When Disappointed in Our Spouse, Do We Address Their Conduct or Attack Their Character?

When Disappointed in Our Spouse, Do We Address Their Conduct or Attack Their Character?

When Disappointed in Our Spouse, Do We Address Their Conduct or Attack Their Character?
Marriage
Image duration icon
6
min read
“My Response Is My Responsibility”—7 Fears and 7 Benefits

“My Response Is My Responsibility”—7 Fears and 7 Benefits

“My Response Is My Responsibility”—7 Fears and 7 Benefits
Marriage
Image duration icon
10
min read
According To Jesus, All We Need To Be Content Is Food, Covering, And One More Thing...

According To Jesus, All We Need To Be Content Is Food, Covering, And One More Thing...

According To Jesus, All We Need To Be Content Is Food, Covering, And One More Thing...
Christian Life
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6
min read
Our Eyes Have Not Seen

Our Eyes Have Not Seen

You and I have not seen Christ with our eyes. After His ascension into Heaven, all subsequent believers would believe in Him without literally seeing Him. Jesus spoke to this when He uttered, "Blessed are they who did not see, and yet believed”(John 20:29).

Our Eyes Have Not Seen
Christian Life
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1
min read
Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 3

Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 3

Part 2 once again asked the question, “Who is responsible for the success...or failure…of your marriage?” Not every couple wants the pastor to help. Some have secret agendas to justify their actions. Unscrupulous Actions I’ve often thought about the people who have made confessions to me after they ended a marriage. Though they did not come to me early on, I’d hear transparent comments about their previous manipulation.

Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 3
Marriage
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3
min read
Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 2

Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 2

Part 1 asked two vital questions. The first question is, “Are you distorting the truth from your counselor as grounds to divorce your spouse?” The second question is, “Who do you feel is responsible for the success or failure of your marriage? Does last resort mean you are desperate for help?” Back when I started pastoral counseling at around age 25, I remember a particular day when a wife came to see me about her decision to divorce her husband. As I explored the biblical justifications for divorce, asking her when her husband deserted her or committed adultery, she said, “Oh, he hasn’t committed adultery or left me.”

Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 2
Marriage
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4
min read
Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 1

Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 1

As I was growing up my mother used to say laughingly, “Relatives and friends come to our home as ‘The Last Resort!’” We had a swimming pool on the side of a hill overlooking a deep valley. A beautiful setting in which to swim, but not exactly a resort - only the last resort!Mom’s humorous meaning differed from others who used to come to my office for marital counseling. As they entered they would say, “Pastor, we have serious marriage problems. You are our last resort.”

Who Is Responsible For the Success of Your Marriage? – Part 1
Marriage
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3
min read
Do You Only Give Love and Respect When Your Spouse Deserves it?

Do You Only Give Love and Respect When Your Spouse Deserves it?

What would you think if your husband said something like the following: “On a scale of 1–10, you have to be at least a 7 according to my standards before I will speak to you with a loving tone of voice. If you are a 6 or below, I will talk to you any way I like. If I sound a little rough or crude, get used to it.” What would you think if your wife said something like the following:

Do You Only Give Love and Respect When Your Spouse Deserves it?
Marriage
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4
min read
Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Esteem - Part 2

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Esteem - Part 2

In part 1 of this series, I discussed the difference between carnal and healthy self-love, and why it is important for Christians to understand the significance of both. But what do we do about it? How do we develop a healthy self-love? Simply put: people view themselves as God views them. We do not listen to the accuser of the brethren condemning us about our shameful past, but instead we receive the forgiveness of Christ who loves us and died for us.

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Esteem - Part 2
Christian Life
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2
min read
Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Esteem - Part 1

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Esteem - Part 1

Much of today’s self-esteem teaching is centered around the love of the self, or rather the old self, fallen nature or the carnal person. Paul refers to this when he says, “...people will be lovers of self” (2 Timothy 3:2 ESV). This is the carnal self and it is not a good thing. This is why the Christian community has been scratching its head over the self-esteem teaching. Should there be self-love or should there not be self-love?

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Esteem - Part 1
Christian Life
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4
min read
Basic Principles of Effective Communication

Basic Principles of Effective Communication

John is a student writing a paper on male and female communication. He emailed me saying, "I would be honored if you would please take a few, brief moments and answer three questions for me."Question #1: In your opinion, what communication breakdowns occur between males and females?

Basic Principles of Effective Communication
Marriage
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4
min read

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