A weekly podcast with Emerson Eggerichs, Ph.D.
Read about Marriage, Parenting and Christian Life
Short video questions and answers with Emerson
Curated content on a variety of topics
Browse all Love & Respect books, studies, and gifts
Couple and Small Group series for your home or church
Love & Respect and many more by Emerson Eggerichs, Ph.D.
A few things you might enjoy or gift to someone else
Learn a little about Love & Respect
In partnership with Matt Loehr and Dare to Be Different
Support us and impact others through your generous donation.
Reach out with any questions you have!
“Respect is earned.” Have you heard that sentiment before? It’s a fairly popular thought in culture today, even bleeding into the church and our interpretations of passages like Ephesians 5:33: “However, each one of you [husbands] also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
Men and women have differing sexual and emotional needs, which I have preached for forty years. But be assured, this does not mean that one does not have sexual needs and the other does not have emotional needs. Differing does not mean nonexistent.
Back before I began sharing across the world the Love and Respect message, based on Ephesians 5:33, we surveyed seven thousand people with the following question: "During a conflict with your spouse, do you feel unloved or disrespected?"
Truth be told, the vast majority of disagreements that arise between husband and wife are what I call disagreements in the gray areas of life. Meaning there is not a clear, black-and-white answer to who is right and who is wrong.
Some claim that because Jesus Christ describes Himself as "the Son of Man" (instead of “the Son of God”) in three of the gospels about Christ's life and ministry (Matthew, Mark, and Luke), this proves he was not the Son of God, and thus not God.
I have spoken to and counseled countless numbers of extremely successful professionals—Fortune 500 company executives, NFL coaches and general managers, professional athletes, church ministry leaders, and many others at the top of their game.
In science, attempting to describe the origin of the cosmos remains an enigma beyond the reach of empirical inquiry. The events that transpired during and before the Big Bang (the name scientists give to the beginning of the universe as we know it) defy conventional understanding, transcending the boundaries of our known laws of nature.
In Matthew 19:9, Jesus said, “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” Put another way, if a spouse has committed adultery, this kind of immorality is grounds for the marriage’s dissolution.
Think back to your last few arguments with your spouse. The times when something he or she did or said really set you off. Maybe you were fuming mad, even if for only a few moments. Perhaps you stirred angry in bed or vented with your friend about how upset you had become with your spouse.
We’ve all at some point entered a room, flipped the light switch, and discovered that the lights won’t come on. When this happens, what is usually the next thing we do? Right, we try it a second time. Maybe even a third time. But short of the rare situation where we learn our first failed attempt to turn on the light was merely a result of us not flipping the switch all the way, did our second and third attempts produce different results? Not at all.
In Exodus 20:14, when God first gave Moses and the Israelites the Ten Commandments, He listed plain and simple: “You shall not commit adultery.” Later, during Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, He reemphasized this command: “You have heard it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’” (Matthew 5:27). And, oddly enough, the world agrees with this!
I put together an online course a few years ago on the Win-Win Marriage in which I provide participants a six-step process for finding win-win.
In the classic Charles Dickens tale A Christmas Carol, Ebenezer Scrooge needs encounters with three ghosts—those of Christmas past, of Christmas present, and of Christmas future—so as to be able to step out of his shoes for a moment and see how his horrid actions and attitude are affecting those around him in negative ways that he can’t see otherwise.
Articles, Podcasts, Ask Emerson on a concept or theme