How Do I Help Another Find God’s Will When They Ask Me for Advice?

The apostle Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:20 that, as believers, we are “ambassadors for Christ.” Have you ever thought much on that before? If you are a child of God, forgiven by the saving work of Jesus, then you are an ambassador for Jesus here on earth! 

Most of us think of ambassadors in the political sense, which is actually a great analogy. Many countries, including the United States, appoint ambassadors to live and work in foreign countries so that the country he or she represents has an active presence and voice in the foreign country. For example, the US ambassador living in England represents the United States’ interests and often makes decisions on its behalf.

That is not too different than how we as Christians serve as Christ’s ambassadors here on earth. We learn in Hebrews 13:14 that “this world is not our home”; instead, our eternal home awaits us after this life. However, while we are here in this temporary home, we serve as God’s ambassadors.

With this in mind, may I suggest to you that there might be people in your world coming to you for advice on discovering God’s unique will for them? And as God’s ambassadors, you can help them! 

If you’re like me, I feel very apprehensive about being God’s ambassador because of how I might unintentionally misrepresent His Word and will. Just as a political ambassador must rightly represent the president and country, so we must rightly represent King Jesus and His kingdom.

First Things First: The Four Wills of God

So what do we do? When a person asks us to help him or her discover God’s unique will and leading, we must first determine if this person is obeying the four universal wills of God.

What do I mean by the four universal wills of God? In His Word to us, God has highlighted, so to speak, four scriptures that say, “For this is the will of God.” These four passages set forth four universal wills of God for all cultures and generations. If a believer says that he or she is seeking the unique will and leading of God yet is disobeying these four universal wills, I do not believe this person is seeking the unique will and leading of God. Instead, this man or woman wants God to sanction his or her own will, saying in effect, “My will, oh God, not your will be done!”

Keep two points in mind: 

1. God will not reveal His unique will to big Johnny moving to Chicago while big Johnny is disobeying God’s universal will that has been clearly laid out for him already. 
2. If big Johnny comes to you for advice, you must determine if big Johnny is obeying God’s universal will before you focus on God’s unique will for big Johnny moving to Chicago. 

Overview of God’s Four Wills

Let’s consider these four universal wills.

1. Believe in God’s Son.

“For this is the will of My Father, that everyone who beholds the Son and believes in Him will have eternal life, and I Myself will raise him up on the last day.” (John 6:40)

2. Abstain from sexual sin.

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality.” (1 Thessalonians 4:3)

3. Give thanks in tough times.

“In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

4. Submit to bosses.

“Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority, or to governors as sent by him for the punishment of evildoers and the praise of those who do right. For such is the will of God that by doing right you may silence the ignorance of foolish men.” (1 Peter 2:13-16) 

Conversations About God’s Will

Based on these four scriptures, let me share how I respond to a Christian who comes to me for advice on God’s unique will and leading—let’s call this person Chris. This can be an informal chat across the fence in the backyard between two believers. Do not envision a pastor’s office but having a coffee at Starbucks. This could be someone from work, in the neighborhood, or from a small group. This could be someone in the choir, a golfing buddy, or a woman you know from day care. Because they like you, they want to engage you on your opinion about what they should do and whether or not you think God is leading them in a certain direction. 

“Chris, I’m honored that you would include me on these issues before you. Share with me what is happening and the options before you.”

(I let Chris share the issue with me. That issue may be about a job, marriage, children, health, etc. I let Chris talk.)

I then would share the below with Christ:

Did you know the Bible highlights, so to speak, four wills of God? Jesus, Paul, and Peter all said about certain things, “This is the will of God.” Chris, from what I know about you so far, you have already obeyed one of these wills. You would answer “yes” to the first question: 

1. Do you believe in God’s Son?

Jesus said in John 6:40, “For this is the will of My Father, that everyone who beholds the Son and believes in Him will have eternal life, and I Myself will raise him up on the last day.”

Praise God you are already obeying this first, and most important, will of God for your life! But there are three other universal wills of God. The Lord once asked me if I was obeying each of these. Because if I claimed I would follow whatever unique will He had for my life but I was not following what He had clearly revealed in the Bible as His universal will for all of us, then I was fooling myself about wanting His unique will and leading. 

Chris, permit me to ask you three questions concerning these three wills. But don’t tell me your answers. Keep those answers to yourself. This is a kind of checklist. 

2. Do you abstain from sexual sin?

Paul said in 1Thessalonians 4:3, “For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality.”

In other words, if you are having an affair, addicted to pornography, or read books that ignite your sensual fantasies, I believe God is using our time together to point you in the direction He intends for you to head at this time: abstaining from sexual sin. His unique will concerning this issue you shared earlier with me takes a back seat to your need to focus on this universal will for your life. First things first. When you obey this universal will first, then God unfolds for you His unique will. 

The apostle John wrote in 1 John 3:22 that “whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight.” In other words, when you please God by obeying His universal commandments—in this instance, abstaining from sexual sin—God gives you what you ask concerning your unique concerns, whether it be about your marriage, parenting, job opportunity, etc. 

3. Do you give thanks in tough times?

In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul told us, “In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

In other words, has anything bad happened about which you resent God? Because of this bad thing, do you refuse to believe that God is causing all things, including these bad things, to work together for good? Are you unwilling to thank God in anticipating Him working even this bad thing together for good? Or, are you like Job’s wife who said, “Curse God and die!”? If you refuse to give thanks to God in obedience to His universal will, why would God reveal His unique will to you? You don’t like God or trust God.

Again, I believe God is using our time together to point you in the direction He intends for you to head at this time: giving thanks in tough times. His unique will concerning this issue you shared earlier with me takes a back seat to your need to focus on this universal will for your life. 

I wish I could tell you otherwise, I really do. But I can’t. God didn’t let me off the hook concerning these scriptures, and I don’t believe He lets anyone off the hook. But as the apostle John said, when we please God by obeying His universal commandment, we receive from Him what we ask concerning His unique will for us.

Lastly…

4. Do you submit to bosses?

First Peter 2:13-15 tells us, “Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority, or to governors as sent by him for the punishment of evildoers and the praise of those who do right. For such is the will of God that by doing right you may silence the ignorance of foolish men.” 

In other words, at work or in any setting where you come under authority, do you do what is right? Or, do you rebel against these authority figures by deceiving, cheating, lying to, stealing from, or neglecting these bosses who request of you to do what they expect?

Again, I believe God is using our time together to point you in the direction He intends for you to head at this time: submitting to bosses.

Chris, here is the good news, if you answer yes to all four questions, I believe God will unfold to you His unique will and personal leading concerning this issue on your heart. When you have on your heart what is on God’s heart, God has on His heart what is on your heart.

I point out to people that in their lives are believers who continually experience answers to prayer. Why? They are less concerned about God’s unique will in their lives and far more focused on God’s universal will. These folks think about pleasing God by beholding the Son of God, abstaining from sexual sins, giving thanks in tough times, and submitting to bosses. As peculiar as some of these may seem, the bottom line is this: What matters to God, matters. What God declares as important is important. When God highlights in yellow, so to speak, His will, we need to pay attention and obey.

Why? God wants to give to us. 

Friend, What About You?

Our goal with people who want our advice is to put them in a position to receive the best from God. But that demands a little from us. We need to find out first if they:

1. Believe in God’s Son
2. Abstain from sexual sins
3. Give thanks in tough times
4. Submit to bosses.

Remember what Paul said: “For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but wanting to have their ear tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in accordance to their own desires” (2 Timothy 4:3). You and I must not be those who tickle people’s ears by telling them what they want to hear.

In addition, we cannot export what we refuse to import. As we close, would you reflect on your own desire to experience God’s unique will and leading in your life. Are you positioned to receive that guidance because you believe in God’s Son, abstain from sexual sin, give thanks in tough times, and submit to bosses?