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I Wanted to Quit My Marriage

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Have you ever tried to apply Love and Respect to your marriage and then wanted to throw in the towel? Galatians 6:9 says, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Let’s hear how one weary wife made the decision to not give up.

At first, I radically changed.

Something radically changed in me through applying Love & Respect.

My husband said I was like an entirely new person and I fed off of those compliments.

At first, I was totally relying upon the Spirit for His leading and promptings throughout the day. I apologized when needed, smiled, was friendly and learned to let go of things.

But my husband wasn’t changing...

After about ten months of this, I started to grow weary. Very weary.  My husband was not changing whatsoever and what started in the Spirit’s power began to be something I was doing in my own strength.

I remember the exact moment when I thought “Bag this. I quit.” While things never went badly like they were before, we had our share of strife again. Even so, he said our marriage was an 8 out of a 10.  

I secretly thought it was lower. It wasn’t bad. It wasn’t good.

In early 2012 I started to deal with all of the physical and sexual trauma I suffered through as a child. Dealing with all of that has been something that I didn’t even know was affecting me so much.  

This is not manipulation.

My husband and I have since done nothing but grow closer in the last few years. We worked through why he never responded during that first year of counseling. He felt it was still manipulative on my part and after a while, he was probably right.

A person needs to love or respect their spouse in reverence to Christ and not to change their spouse. Seems like I’ve heard that before somewhere….???

Now we are on the same team.

Although we are not perfect, things are secure, loving and positive.

If there is any tension, we have chosen to remember that we are on the same team and not out to get one another. I am so thankful to God that he has blessed me with my husband, who I really respect, admire and love! He is my greatest blessing!   

What a great and awesome God whose very life lives inside of us! Even our boys have changed so much.

It’s all Him but I’m still easily brought to tears when I remember the profound effect Love & Respect had on me. It was such a huge game changer, touching more issues than you are probably even aware.

One person can influence a marriage.

Please let the people you see know that, yes, one person can influence a marriage for the better and we can testify to that. Thankfully, we are finally now at the point where we are both looking to love/respect the other regardless of what the other person does.

Glory to God, again I say!

~ Anonymous

We thank God with this couple! If you find yourself wanting to “bag this” and quit, we pray you will reconsider. Don’t grow weary. Apply Love and Respect consistently and see what God can do!


Emerson Eggerichs, Ph.D.
Author, Speaker, Pastor

Questions to Consider