Testimonials

My relationship with my twenty-two-year-old son improved overnight! Who knew that... simple changes in words could make such a difference. Now I tell him how much I appreciate him, and he tears up. Before, I told him I loved him and got back, "I know, I know, I luv u too." Learning the right words to get my feelings across in a way they can be assimilated was so easy!

A mother and preschool director wrote: We have four children, two boys and two girls. Our boys are in the middle and sixteen months apart. Our boys were arguing, bickering, and annoying each other on purpose around ages nine and ten... I would remind them to “be nice” or “show kindness,” and their actions would change for the moment, but it didn’t reach their hearts. As I applied the respect principle to them and said things such as “You aren’t showing your brother respect when you ______________.” Or “You show your friends respect, so you need to extend that same respect to your brother.” It was life-changing; it spoke to their hearts. Don’t get me wrong, they still have disagreements at thirteen and fourteen, but they are quick to resolve them, and they are best friends.

The Illumination Project does a wonderful job making it clear that relationships are worth it, there is a way for them to work, and they don’t have to fail if both people know how to avoid pitfalls like the crazy cycle. And it was especially great knowing that it was all backed up by Biblical principles. There is a way that God intended for relationships to work, and it’s not even all that difficult to understand! It was incredibly encouraging, even for a single guy like me.

Joy and her father are actually funny. That’s rare, and it makes what they say genuinely entertaining. I loudly applaud their insightful, personal, and humorous approach to the subject of singleness, dating and marriage for the next generation. There simply isn’t another study that artfully combines research, scripture, personal stories, and music -- not to mention a few wacky videos that could ruin Dr. Eggerichs’ credibility. Having a teenage daughter of my own, I am hugely grateful Joy created this project and believe it will help the next generation talk about marriage and it’s purpose right now, instead of with a divorce lawyer 20 years from now.

I attended a "Respectfully Yours”…twice!  I loved it!  This study has helped me tremendously in my relationship with God and my marriage. I had been spinning my wheels on the Crazy Cycle for over 30 years. I failed miserably trying to do marriage my way in my own strength.  I thought my husband was the problem and I planned to divorce him after the kids left home.

God had another plan! (Thank you Lord!). He provided this study to teach me His truth, His wisdom, His ways. He loves me and wants what is best for me!  And I'm entrusting myself to Him.  "Respectfully Yours" taught me how to honor God and do marriage His way. To focus on what I need to do, not what my husband needs to do. I learned more about who God is and who I am in Him, how God made husbands and wives different, how to be obedient to God's command to respect my husband…unconditionally, regardless of whether or not he responds with the love I need from him. That seemed impossible…but I decided to try it. With God's grace, help and guidance I realized I can do this and it feels good and right. This study has made such a difference in my life and marriage. I am more at peace and my husband is responding to me in a more loving and caring way. My prayer is for every woman young and old to put their hope and trust in the Lord and do this study and experience the power of God in her life and marriage. God bless every one of you at Love and Respect and every study group leader as you spread the message.

"Just wanted to say that this ministry is really blessing my life. I have been able to share it with other people and it already blessed them as well! Please don't EVER GIVE UP! I am sure sometimes, it must be very difficult. But it is so worthy to spread this message. So many marriages being attacked and in need of information like this."

My small group of twenty something women just finished week three of TIP last night, and I am LOVING it! The content is obviously great (way to relate to and entertain a group of easily jaded/skeptical/seen-it-all/overwhelmed twentysomethings!), the concepts are something we’re all wrestling through together, but the very best part is Joy’s encouragement to be multigenerational. We have about six older women who’ve rotated through our weekly gatherings, and that element is making this one of the BEST things I’ve ever been a part of! It’s really amazing. Having these women—from a woman who’s been married more than 50 years to a fiftysomething never-been-married woman to thirty- and fortysomething women with kids—listen, share their hearts and experiences, share their own illuminations and wrestle with the concepts and God’s truth alongside my girls is SO DARN AMAZING. For one, it takes pressure off me as the leader to ‘have all the answers’ (I’m 29 and have been married for six years... I barely know what I’m doing myself!). And the fact that these women from different places in life are getting to know one other, open up to each other, ugh.... there. just. aren’t. words.

You have empowered me to do better to follow God’s desire for my marriage. You have also given me a new hope and encouragement. It has been a blessed time for me, Thank you.

Your materials recognize that every person involved may improve their approach to strengthen the team and each has the responsibility to do so.  Appreciate your encouragement to view ourselves from the exterior perspective that we might be more effective and productive in our work alongside people facing that exterior, no matter our role or profession.

…I had a heart-to-heart talk with our 35-year old son this past week. I started reading “Mother and Son” while we were still at the conference and was deeply convicted just after reading the intro! I texted my son immediately and said: “only gotten through the intro to Emerson’s new book and have learned that I have always loved you deeply, but have not always respected you – as a young boy or as a man. For that I deeply apologize and have much to seek your forgiveness for. God has already shown me two very specific times. Can we talk after I get home…at a time convenient for you?” he responded fairly quickly and said: “Yes we can”. We had a great 2-hour talk…and then, just as he was leaving, he came up behind me and put his arms around me and said, “I love you, Mom.” Whew…so special!

"A wonderful change in our relationship began and we both tried to be understanding of each other. Your course just fit in perfectly and filled in the missing pieces…We are to respect our differences. Laughter and peace has come into our home again. Thank you! (My husband) and I had several opportunities to share the principles of Love and Respect with several other Christian couples and of how God was working in our lives and marriage…Already we have had some couples into our home and shared our experience and then we sit and play your CD and end it by praying a prayer of forgiveness and healing for our relationships."

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Win-Win marriages are fulfilling. Marriages without Win-Win don't seem happy or fulfilling. Since I do not want to be unfulfilled, Win-Win is a skill I need to have. This course provided me with this skill. Thank you.