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You may have arrived at Love and Respect because you are hurt, frustrated, confused, fearful, angry, or worse. You may be in-crisis. While we are not a counseling service (you should seek that out locally if that is what is needed or get out of harms way if that is your circumstance), I believe the following recommendations will be helpful.

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I understand.

My mom and dad divorced. Fortunately, they reconciled and remarried. However, later they separated for five years. I went through this heartache growing up. Sarah, my wife, and I have heard from thousands of people over the last 16 years tell of us their feelings of helplessness and hopelessness.

You may be at that point.

I can help you with a simple truth that has helped more than 2 million people. I wish I could sit down with you face to face but in some ways I can help you more when you read or watch what I say, pausing to take it in. Truth is, if we met personally, I would tell you the same thing as we sipped coffee, talking heart to heart. I would begin by telling you of the Crazy Cycle that every couple experiences. I would share that you are not alone and abnormal when spinning on the Crazy Cycle. But if you don’t understand the Crazy Cycle, you can get off track, and that’s when one of you, or both of you, start making unhealthy choices. But when you grasp the Crazy Cycle, many times a relationship takes a turn for the better, and quite quickly. That could happen to you as much as you cannot imagine it. Trust me, I have seen the miracle countless times over the years as I have served marriages full time.

Remember, as bad as things are, they did not start out bad in most cases. Instead, repeated misunderstandings – often honest misunderstandings – took their toll. Then, in some instances, adultery happened or explosive arguments that leave both deeply wounded and closed off to each other. Even so, you want to move forward and that’s why you are here, but the hurt, frustration, confusion, fear, and anger feels overwhelming and insurmountable. I am for you in this season.

I applaud your courage to reach out to us.

With Love and Respect,